That very thin line
Some people come into our lives without us realizing it. Until the proper time comes, that is. For Cristina that was the case. Because her and Jacob’s path had crossed many time over the past year. But none of them had noticed. They were too busy living their lives at that moment to realise where fate was pushing them to.
The first time they collided, they literally ran into each other. She was getting off a bus and he was racing to catch the next one. They crashed, but being too concerned with the time pressure they were both facing, they did not even exchange glances.
A few times, they frequented the same night bar with separate groups of friends. But they never saw each other.
When they finally met, they were at a bar waiting for their drinks. He offered to pay for hers, but she politely refused. He tried to offer her another a few minutes later. She hesitated but decided to accept. He asked for her number and showed he was eager to see her again soon. She found it too quick a move and discretely dismissed him. For her, he was not even worth it.
But he persisted. And decided to chase her. She decided to give him the chance.
He sent her flowers, took her on long walks on the beach at sunset, and revealed a romantic side to him that few men admit to having.
She fell for him.
But then she saw something different. She saw how men can be just as jealous – or even more – as women. And she disliked the way he was looking for opportunities to make her feel bad.
She discovered that there is a very thin line between love and hate. Because there are people we love to hate and others we hate because we love them so much. It’s confusing, but no-one ever said that the human race was a simple species to understand.
There were so many instances when she knew she should be angry at him, but all she could feel was sorrow. At the time wasted being upset with stupid little things, and not spending it together.
Her psychiatrist friend had told her that “people make us feel the way we allow them to”. She also tried to make her see that there was no use in trying to find justification for everything. “An explanation will come only when you don’t need it anymore. And it will usually be even less than the one you expect”.
All she could do was remain true to the person she was. To be patient and optimistic that things would turn around for the best once and for all, and she could finally stop being afraid of actually saying or feeling what she truly felt.
“There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart’s desire. The other is to gain it.” – Bernard Shaw