MC's Whispers

Whispering Silences

Archive for the tag “emotions”

A blink in time

http://bereadytovote.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/01/ElectionDays.jpgWhen you start counting your past in two-digit numbered-years, you know you’ve lived a lot. But you never cease to be amazed by how rapidly time really rushes by. It’s only when you think of what has been that you begin to realise the magnitude of the things you’ve experienced and all the things you’ve managed to do and survive. Yet you’ll always sadden at the thought that many of those things and people that accompanied you in your earlier years don’t exist anymore. And you tremble at the frightening thought that the same fate awaits you sometime in your future. All you can hope is that it will be far away.

As children we believe that the people around as are immortal. And that our surroundings will endure forever, surviving every disaster, natural or manmade. It is as we grow up that this innocence and lack of realism is lost. As is our ability to dream.

We live in a world that is both terrifying and wonderful. One in which time passes by so fast that if you blink you’ll miss the moments you have to live.

Our lives are but a swish in this vast universe and all we can do is take as much out of them as we possible can. Make a reality out of your dreams; do the things that scare you but will make you stronger; spend more time with the people you love; demonstrate your appreciation and gratitude to those that matter; and help those that can’t help themselves. A life well-lived is one that is full to the brim with experiences, with as least regrets as possible, with memories you cherish, and with the satisfaction that you took advantage to the utmost of all the time that was given to you.

“If we wait until we’re ready, we’ll be waiting for the rest of our lives” – Lemony Snicket

 

Waking a sleeping fire

http://6iee.com/373250.htmlThere are some feelings, which are dormant until they are sparked into life. Like jealousy and fear. You don’t realise they are so intense until they’re awake. Because then it feels that you’ve set a match on fire inside your veins.

It is said no to “do unto others what you don’t want others to do unto you”. To treat people as you would like to be treated, because even the nicest people have their limits. And we are raised to understand how people of different classes, backgrounds or even gender are so unlike yet so similar.

Women, for example, want men to cherish them as special and exclusive, just as men want their girl to bedazzle everyone but have eyes only for them. But at various points in time, each need to enter each other’s shoes to understand and to consider how they would act had they been on the other side.

Trust, just as love, is a two-way street. And it is earned through time, experience and mutual respect. Trust is what you convince others to be true, it is what allays their fears and combats the dragons that rise when one part of the pair is away. Love is how you show you care, so much that it is reciprocated.

And to harmonise it all into a healthy relationship requires that you also rid of any signs of selfishness that infect the invisible chain that binds a couple. It entails that communication is so strong that their eyes can speak straight to their heart. It needs love to roar louder than the demons.

All it really takes is a small act of kindness once in a while that will go a long way. One that will put the demons asleep and waken the heart. Because remember, the heart is a tiny organ that, however, sustains your entire being and it is on this that your very existence relies.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Dormant

Also part of Daily Prompt: Harmonize

The simplest of things, the greatest of impacts

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/d0/12/db/d012dbaaf25aadb98eb810d3da28d29f--animal-kingdom-google.jpgIt is common logic that if you don’t show appreciation to the persons who deserve it, they’ll learn to stop doing those things that help you out, that make your life easier. Because to be honest, a person’s greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated.

Like Margaret Cousins said, “Appreciation can make a day, even change a life. Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary”.

Being told you matter, you’re appreciated, respected even, loved, is among the simplest yet most uplifting things you can hear.

It’s important to demonstrate you care, because people’s lives are based on – and often filled with – emotions. It’s how we feel alive. How we feel we matter. How we know that what we do has an impact and makes a difference. Being shown that you are valued is what will keep you going.

It doesn’t take much. It’s usually just a few words, a simple action, the smallest of deeds. But to the receiver, it means the world.

The disorder of having everything in order

http://wallpapercave.com/wp/3SmQ4wC.jpgThere is a thing with overthinkers – they usually feel everything too intensely too. And worse – perhaps – of all, they need everything to be in order. They are people who like to have a programme and as much as possible stick to it. They need to know how they want their day to pan out, so that they can try to do as many of those things they can. They are the people who fill their desks with post-its and when they strike out one task add another two.

But these are also the people who can’t stand the uncertainty of not knowing. Of not having a schedule and of being victim to a “wait and see” mentality. They might even panic in the face of this ambiguity.

They are people who usually suffer from an obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) of needing to have an order in their life for calm to prevail.

At the same time, these are those who have the deepest emotions. The ones who tear up from a line in a movie, from a surprise of a loved one, from a simple thank you for something they did well. In fact, this latter is what touches them the most – the demonstration of acknowledgement, appreciation and gratification that they are, they do, and they try, at the best of their abilities. It’s nice to tell those that matter that they do, and to these specific people, sometimes the simplest of words may mean the world.

Overthinkers may seem insane, but the world was never changed by sanity.

The blue ball

sad_blue_eye_by_emilyeggplantImagine the sensors inside your head as a small ball that light up according to the emotion you feel. Think, for example, that when you’re excited, happy, positive, the ball lights up yellow, shining brightly and illuminating your entire brain and thus essence. But when you’re sad, that ball becomes blue.

Although associated with serenity and calmness, blue is also often linked to sadness. And when the ball in our head turns blue, that is usually when the waterworks begin, when the tears fall sometimes even without you truly knowing why.

It is much harder to change the colour of the blue ball into something else than any other colour transformation. But often times it is necessary to offer yourself some sense of reprieve. To allow yourself to get rid of the blue ball and its negativity that brings you down.

We need the colour in our lives, to enable ourselves to change moods for our own psychological sanity. It is not often easy. But balls are made to roll.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Reprieve

Intruder alert

http://7-themes.com/6872314-cloudy-sky-landscape.htmlThey creep in at night, under your sheets, through the barred or open windows, in the silence just when you think everything is fine. They disrupt your serenity and upset you without you ever truly comprehending why. And your mood changes indefinitely, depriving you from the ability to control even that.

Intruders are sneaky. They invade your mind when you least expect it.

They cause you to lose sleep and ruffle the sheets, tossing and turning in bed, waking up even more tired than the night before and much more depressed. But the worst part is, you can’t explain why.

Intruders plant thoughts in your head and make you anxious, jealous, skeptical, suspicious.

They cause you to draw scenarios that to an outsider may seem insane but to you, at the moment, may seem perfectly rational.

They result in you becoming a little more bitter, more cynical, more irritable.

And all you really need is some reassurance that you are not as crazy as you believe; that everything is and will continue to be fine.

You need that strong, warm embrace that will carry you into a peaceful sleep, forgetting everything else and enabling you to wake up and face another day stronger.

You want to get rid of those intruders. But sometimes you can’t do it alone.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Bitter

Blink or Think

blinkThe real purpose of books is to trap the mind into doing its own thinking” (Christopher Morley). Some books excel at it. And it is not just the ones that engage you into travelling away from reality, but rather those that make you think more of it.

In Blink: The Power of Thinking without Thinking, Malcolm Gladwell manages to do exactly that. He makes you consider how those first thoughts you have are the ones that matter the most and are often more correct than if you think thoroughly through something.

The book points out that “the key to good decision-making is not knowledge. It is understanding”. That is why, for instance, when people talk, we listen to their words and watch their eyes in order to pick up the expressive nuances that reveal if what they’re saying is true.

Through a series of stories and case studies, Gladwell attempts to “understand this mysterious thing called judgement – the kind of wisdom someone acquires after a lifetime of learning and watching and doing”. “From experience, we gain a powerful gift, the ability to act instinctively, in the moment. But it is easy to disrupt this gift”, because we live in a world saturated with information and sometimes that works against our judgement. Those subtle influences from our surroundings, our background, our experiences, our network, often very much affect the bias of our unconscious. As such, we are already prejudiced in our decisions, particularly if we dwell hard on them.

These are the “unexpected costs of knowing too much”. That you allow your judgement to be clouded by too many things – often stereotypes. “We are inundated with information and we have come to confuse information with understanding.” That is why, as the book very eloquently explains, “sometimes we can make better judgement with less information”.

The impression you form in a blink – in milliseconds – is in fact more truthful than the one you allow yourself to form after thinking a situation through and permitting the stereotypes in your head to barge through. The point is not to listen with your eyes, but with what your instinct tells you. It is the power of first impressions, of rapid cognition.

It is true of course that “there are some situations where the human mind needs a little help” – where more information is required to form a proper decision. After all, “truly successful decision-making relies on a balance between deliberate and instinctive thinking”.

But, in the issues that matter most, perhaps the decisions that stem from the unconscious are the ones that will in the end make us happier.

Think about it. Maybe next time just trust that ‘blink’ you get as a first thought and see what happens.

Speak in any way

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-h-nYtjFunAw/Uq5S_l6AVwI/AAAAAAAAS3E/wZwKGL6FcKo/s1600/clear-mind-300x192.jpgYour eyes can say things you refuse to utter. The things you keep sealed off in your silence. Those things that you slowly release with every sigh.

We can’t always comprehend what your soul is trying to say. That is why we need to speak. We need the voice to say what our heart fears to show.

Sometimes we need to shout, others to whisper; every form of communication, however, involves talking. There is often no other way of realizing what it is you feel, what thoughts you hide behind that veil of serenity. It is not easy to hear certain things. And often your fear overclouds what you utter. It is why it is said that you should not speak in panic or anger, for you do not know the (harmful) truths you risk saying.

But it is always best to say it. To look into the eyes you wish to address and truthfully pour out your heart’s concerns. It is the preferable and easiest way to avoid misunderstandings and lessen the path towards each other.

For the more you keep silent the more you push the other one away and the more your hearts drift apart.

The secret to any relationship is learning to speak to each other, even when we don’t want to.

Cursed to feel

https://secure.static.tumblr.com/5332aa58d90d1b62cdcfb76b42e2fc3a/uhqpxjc/kAgn1552y/tumblr_static_dark_rose_by_darkblade221-d3fa2xy.jpgIt may be a sign of determination; of decisiveness; sometimes even stubbornness. But it may also be one of insecurity; often even fear. When we set our minds on something and stick to it; when we ponder too much over it; when we refuse to simply let it go. It’s what adds to the stress of our daily lives and disrupts our pleasant mood for no apparent reason.

As difficult as it may be, we need to train ourselves to let some things slide. Especially those we most fear. Because it is true that the greatest things will happen when we distance ourselves from negativity. It’s not about pretending that you don’t care; it’s about getting over it and paying more attention to the things that really matter.

We are cursed to feel. As much as we may love and laugh and live, feeling is the most profound of all experiences we have. And the deeper you feel, the more you overthink, you overanalyze, you stress, and you worry.

It was Oprah Winfrey who said “if you look at what you have in life, you’ll always have more. If you look at what you don’t have in life, you’ll never have enough”.

Everything is a matter of perspective, of focus and what you (choose to) hold onto.

The value of Joy

http://i0.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/019/227/Inside-out.jpgWe all have a few voices in our head. They’re the ones that come to you when you’re fretting over a decision to make. Or when you’re in a fight with someone; when you’re too stressed to think straight. Or most of all, when you’re sick and too exhausted to move.

Our lives would be so much easier if only Joy was in our head. Jumping up and down with excitement. But we all experience periods of Sadness, Anger, Fear and even Disgust. They are all part of who we are. And they are the reasons why we appreciate Joy even more, and the moments we spend being happy.

It is during the moments that life strikes you down when you value the times when you are at your best and most upbeat. But it takes a lot of inner strength to get there, and support from those around you and not just the voices in your head.

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