MC's Whispers

Whispering Silences

Archive for the tag “encouragement”

Roots and wings

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/99/a8/52/99a85230057e9941cb6b01a6ba3711e3--black-tree-art-prints.jpgThere is a saying, “if you don’t like where you are, move; you are not a tree”. People were meant to move around, to explore, to evolve. Instead, with the passing of time, we have become so afraid of change that we fear the slightest disturbance of our known environment. We become rooted in one place, often because we don’t have the courage to risk and see what more is out there.

And as such, we close our minds to everything around us. We refuse to accept anything different to our own perceptions, or consider something further from our beliefs.

We become so accustomed to routine, that any turbulence to it is considered lethal; when in fact, it is the other way around.

We encage ourselves in a life that shrinks us and diminishes us instead of helping us grow and develop. We aren’t making ourselves better, rather, we persevere in a mediocrity and preserve a life unchanged, with the same mentality and the same lens on life.

But what we fail to see, is that as we grow, our surroundings change, our needs become different, and so do our characters. We have a different perspective on life when we are young, springing into the world, compared to when we are mature, looking back at it.

After all, we are supposed to receive and pass on two gifts: roots to remind you where you are from, and wings to show what you can become. It is only when you use the latter that you discover where you can go.

Complaining, whining, nagging

http://rbk.h-cdn.co/assets/cm/14/50/548a5ac82c9a3_-_rbk-nagging-0612-1-xln.jpgWe tend to complain. A lot. And the ‘we’ goes to the human species. Because no other animal has the tendency to complain, whine or nag as much as we do.

We often complain so much because we’re too afraid to act. We fear that we might not be able to change circumstances, that there is nothing we can do to make things better. We complain because we don’t believe enough in our own strength and capabilities.

Then again, we too often complain because we feel we deserve better.

We nag because we want things to be done a certain way, usually different to the current one, and we are irritated and agitated if this does not coincide with the notion in our minds.

Motivational speech includes prompts to stop complaining and appreciate things more. To be willing to change and adopt a more positive aspect on life. After all, aren’t optimists the ones who see the glass half-full and a silver lining in everything?

Complaining places you in the position of a victim as it is a sign you do not have control of a situation. It also causes you to waste (valuable) time. Instead, “champions never complain; they are too busy getting better” (John Wooden).

But in the end it all comes down to how good you feel within you and about yourself.

The happiest people don’t have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything”.

Searching for that lost…thing

motivation catWhen your personal trainer tells you “good job” you’re motivated to last a little longer, to try a little harder, to take your limits a bit further.

We all need that encouragement. It’s a boost to reach further than you think you can.

But, similarly, we all need the acknowledgement of a job well done. A recognition of your efforts, be it in the form of a verbal gratification, a written thank you or a monetary compensation.

We need the demonstration of feelings to be satisfied with our own selves. Because just as we often cannot hide what emotion is overwhelming us, in the same context, we would like to be shown that we are admired, sympathized, liked, loved, or even despised. But we want to be clear of what we have to face.

Once in a while, it happens to all of us, though. Losing your motivation or will to do anything creative. And no matter where you search for it, one thing is certain: you’ll never find it unless it comes from within you. Unless you start to do something that’s yours, that expresses you and fulfills you.

Remember, you only fail when you stop trying.

The blue ball

sad_blue_eye_by_emilyeggplantImagine the sensors inside your head as a small ball that light up according to the emotion you feel. Think, for example, that when you’re excited, happy, positive, the ball lights up yellow, shining brightly and illuminating your entire brain and thus essence. But when you’re sad, that ball becomes blue.

Although associated with serenity and calmness, blue is also often linked to sadness. And when the ball in our head turns blue, that is usually when the waterworks begin, when the tears fall sometimes even without you truly knowing why.

It is much harder to change the colour of the blue ball into something else than any other colour transformation. But often times it is necessary to offer yourself some sense of reprieve. To allow yourself to get rid of the blue ball and its negativity that brings you down.

We need the colour in our lives, to enable ourselves to change moods for our own psychological sanity. It is not often easy. But balls are made to roll.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Reprieve

The intruding spring

http://static.wixstatic.com/media/454789_6bb4a3a05395479b9e1bac474f5a0268~mv2_d_4272_2848_s_4_2.jpg_srz_4272_2848_85_22_0.50_1.20_0.00_jpg_srzHenry woke up when a bed spring penetrated his mattress and scratched his knee calf. The sting was enough to make him jump out of bed. Then, he had to get up.

He wasn’t a morning person. Not everybody is. Despite the fact that he was well aware of the French saying that the world belongs to those who get up early (“le monde appartient à ceux qui se lèvent tôt”); he was more of a supporter of the Italian one that it is sweet to do nothing (“dolce far niente”).

This was one of those mornings when he’d rather stay in bed. Henry was the type of person who upon knowing that he had a list of things to do, could not find the urge to do any of them. Instead, he would find other things to do, making his list grow longer.

He was the person who would always find something to do. His problem wasn’t not having something to do, but rather never having enough time to do it. Sometimes even desire.

But today it was different. The intruding spring made him realise that sometimes it is better to get up early because you enjoy more of the day, particularly on mornings illuminated by sunlight. Plus, you often have the chance to spend more time with the people you love.

So despite the inappropriate wake-up call, the day would develop much better and by nightfall Henry would be glad he was pushed out of bed so early.

There is always a more positive side to everything; if you’re open-hearted enough to see it.

The loudness of insecurity

girl-umbrellaIt was the first time Max had found himself in a psychologist’s office. He was postponing it for too long; he needed someone to listen to all the things that had accumulated inside him and were causing him stomach aches. The main problem he had to face was that he cared too much – he over-thought and over-worried about anything. Maybe this doctor would be able to show him how to care less, or at least how to not allow things to affect him as much.

Outside in the waiting room was a sign on the wall, a blue canvas with the inscription “Confidence is silent. Insecurities are loud.” It resonated with Max, as he thought about all the people in his life who annoyed him the most and who he wrongly permitted to distress him – they were all people who claimed center stage, those who thought that everything should be about them, who adopted an attitude close to that of a bully, and who pretended to mask their low self-esteem in (often overly) socialization.

For an hour, Max poured out his feelings to the person he had just met sitting across him in the small, yet cozy, room. He found himself telling him stories and emotions that he had never even admitted to himself. Psychologists, he realised, have a way of making you feel comfortable enough to share your inner most thoughts without dwelling too much on what you’re saying.

When the psychologist’s turn to talk came, Max took out a small notebook to write certain things down. They may have been just phrases, but they would help him in changing his own attitude and facing the situations he was forced to deal with on a daily basis.

“Insecurity is an ugly thing. It makes you hate people you don’t even know. More so, insults are the last resort of insecure people with a crumbling position trying to appear confident. Insecure people seek approval. They try to talk everyone down so that can feel superior. Don’t allow yourself to fall into that trap. Try, as much as you can to ignore them. Just don’t interfere in their lives so that they won’t interfere in yours. Remember, you only give them more power the more attention you devote to them. So simply turn the other way. Demonstrate your own confidence by shying away from the spotlight; let it chase you, not the other way round. Do something different instead: build people up, remind them they’re worthy, tell them they’re incredible; be a light in an often too dim world”.

Max left the office feeling uplifted. Sometimes, all it takes is some words of encouragement to view the situation in a different aspect.

Do something more

lucy-sol

©Lucy Fridkin

“Do something every day that scares you”. Her grandmother’s prompt echoed in her ears every time she felt her heart grow sore with exhaustion. She needed a change. Routine was turning out to be lethal after all.

She woke up determined to take that extra step. So that day she went to the café with a view to the port.

It was cloudy, but ships were sailing.

She had time if she really wanted to do it.

She connected to the Wi-Fi and loaded the website. Tickets were booked in less than a minute.

She would finally go to him.

 

Also part of Friday Fictioneers

Losing to Find

rainy-bridgeIt was in your pocket the last time you looked. Or maybe in your bag. On the back seat of the car. Or was it in the trunk? Either way, you certainly remember having seen it somewhere. But how long ago was that? Where was it now? How did it go missing? And why does it bother you so much?

Losing an object sometimes evokes feelings as strong as losing a person, because we have become so accustomed to associating material goods with memories, people, emotions, moments. No matter how small or insignificant these objects may seem, they are intertwined with our lives, to the extent that sometimes they become an integral part of who we are. That is why when we lose them we panic and feel lost ourselves. It is not really because we realise how much we needed that object. It’s not really a matter of need, but rather of want. It’s wanting that object to exist in our lives so that we are reminded of everything and everyone associated with it.

But sometimes, we lose things so that better ones can arrive. It’s like the wilting of a rose so that a fresh one may bloom. There is supposedly a reason for everything that happens. You just have to trust that whatever that reason may be, it is for the best, for your own good. So for your own inner peace and sanity, sometimes you just need to let go and accept the loss. Better things lie ahead if only you choose to believe it.

“Every one of us is losing something precious to us. Lost opportunities, feelings we can never get back again. That’s part of what it means to be alive” – Haruki Murakami

What it takes to feel good

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_chSWwsAhn0o/TT5BDKaYMUI/AAAAAAAAC8g/oinnbegau6E/s1600/1239972_kite.jpgIt doesn’t really take a lot to make a person feel special or to lift their mood when they’re not feeling well. Contrary to popular beliefs, the way you feel isn’t affected so much by the material you surround yourself with, but rather the people and their attitudes. To make it clearer: it’s not the technology or the objects you have that will make you feel better. It’s the people you share them with. Those who can make you smile no matter what. Who see you’re not well and ask what they can do to make it all better regardless.

You find the greatest expression of sentiment in the smallest of things. In the slightest gestures that mean a lot. Those small things that demonstrate that the people around you are listening to you and remembering the things you say – what you like and don’t, your dreams and desires, a funny story that can be associated somehow at any random moment.

And it is those small things that have the largest impact. It is what can boost your morale and make you feel good even on the cloudiest and darkest of days.

After all, confidence is often gained from what you don’t see. From the new underwear you put on, to the wink of a loved one when only you are watching, to that song that gives you chills when you listen closely to its lyrics.

It doesn’t take a lot to feel good. All it requires is some attention to the things that matter.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Realize

The value of your worth

http://kurld.com/image.php?pic=/images/stars/stars-05.jpgIf you find yourself constantly trying to prove your worth to someone, you have already forgotten your value,” she told him as she took a tray of cookies out of the oven. They were still steaming hot. “What you need to do is show people what you can do. To be so good they can’t ignore you”.  He tried to interrupt and say something, but wasn’t fast enough. “Just because some people won’t be able to see your worth, doesn’t mean that your value as a person decreases”. She placed a box of the cookies she had just made in his hand and as she escorted him to the door said, “remember, it is not the people or their words that give value to our lives, it’s the memories and the actions”.

He was left standing outside the door of an elegant brick-red house with a large yard and a white veranda. The trees were providing much needed shade from the hot sun. And he was eager to bite into the cookies that seduced his nostrils from the moment she had opened the oven and allowed him a peek at them.

He had come with one question. How to make himself important. And she had simply replied, “you can’t. You either believe you are or you’re not”.

She had told him what he was unable to understand. That everything you emanate diffuses from within your soul. A smile radiating from your lips increases your face value. Confidence makes you appear decisive, knowledgeable, maybe even respectable. Your behaviour and your sense of determination gives you the image of a stronger person. An elegant attire adds to your sex appeal and your style. But whatever you do, your value will always stem from the way you feel about yourself. From the satisfaction you have with your life, the level of happiness you have reached with the people who surround you, the work you do, the hobbies you keep yourself busy with. Ultimately, like Warren Buffet said, “price is what you pay, value is what you get”. The trick is knowing how to distinguish between the two.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Value

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