MC's Whispers

Whispering Silences

Archive for the tag “loneliness”

The chaos of an introvert

http://rolereboot.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/Lisa-alone.jpg

Introverts, they say, are weird people. Because you can’t tell what is going on in their head. At times, they themselves don’t even know. Because often they want nothing more than to cuddle alone on the couch under a blanket with a hot drink, a book or a movie. It is their way of getting away from everything.

They won’t push you away. Not unless you turn them away first. Introverts have the characteristic of being willing to do almost everything for a person they care about. Even if that is not acknowledged or reciprocated.

But there comes a time when something breaks, like a glass being shattered too many times. In an introvert this is expressed with a physical illness. The body itself is beginning to complain, raising the alarm that there is something wrong. Of course, the mind already knows it, but something needs to happen to shake you up.

Our thoughts affect us more than we believe. And our mental and psychological state often define our physical well-being.

It is difficult to put your mind at peace when you feel a million things buzzing through your head. We live in a world where calmness is a privilege, one that is sought after through techniques like yoga, mindfulness, even the so many life coaches that have suddenly sprung up. When did things become so difficult that we actually need people to tell us how to live our life? How to breathe and relax and not take everything so deeply? Why do we allow ourselves to be drained by our own thoughts? To drown in our own insecurities and pessimism?

Introverts won’t really tell you how much pain they’re in – either physical or emotional. They hide their chaos inside. But – paradoxically – they will hope you understand. That you will realise what they really need is someone to sit by them on that couch, wrap them up in a soothing hug and convince them that everything will be OK.

Be afraid of the quiet ones, they are the ones who actually think

The light in the dark

http://www.youtodesign.com/uploads/allimg/1412/3385.jpgBilly was born in the dark. Ever since he could remember he was alone in the darkness.

He was somehow found enclosed in a dark room alone. It was like a reality TV game. Where he needed to turn on the light to find his way out of there. No matter how much he felt his way around the walls, it all seemed to be a dead-end. There was no exit. He needed the light. To see where exactly he was and to find a way to escape.

He soon learnt that positive thoughts brought light into the room. Whenever he recalled to mind the little he remembered of his mother, her warm hugs and her tender caress, some light entered the room and it was not pitch black anymore. He thought of all the things he wanted to do once he got out: to leap into his mother’s arms, to find friends to play with, to maybe get a dog. All these thoughts made his heart a little lighter and the room much brighter.

But as soon as a negative thought crossed his mind; like the possibility that he may never get out, that he was for some reason left there alone; the room fell into darkness again.

It took many bright thoughts to bring a spark of light. But a single bad thought would bring back the dark.

Just as in life, one bad moment cancels out all the good. And it stays with you longer.

It is easier to frown than to laugh – it takes more muscles to form a smile. But think about all the benefits the latter has. It makes it worth it in the end.

Billy thought he had to keep on trying. The effort would pay off in the end. He vowed to allow only positive thoughts in his mind, no matter how hard it was. He had to light up the dark. To believe that life was going to get better.

Room to write

writing roomErnest Hemingway had said that “there is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed”. That is really all it takes. To let your soul pour out at your fingertips. To allow your emotions to surface and manifest themselves into words, into stories, into prose on paper.

All you need to do is allow yourself to breathe and feel.

To feel every single thing that is cornered in your psyche. To be able to sit in silence and type. (Or write with a pen or pencil if you are more traditional).

What you really need though is room. Like Virginia Wolf said, “A woman must have money and a room of her own if she is to write”. Money, for the obvious reasons that you need to be able to afford just sitting there typing, and room because you need the space to simply be. To accept the feelings that are overwhelming you, that are weighing down on your shoulders. To permit them to flood out of your heart like a torrent during flood season.

To have the room to be able to lock yourself into. To sit on a big executive chair that wraps around your back and spine like a comforting bear and reassures you that everything will be fine. Just type. Just go on and say whatever is on your mind.

The key in being able to write is being able to accept that the words you form are a small part of your soul breaking away from inside of you. It is allowing yourself to be vulnerable and not minding that the world is authorized a glimpse at your pain. All sad people write. It is an outlet for the pain. Sylvia Plath was told that after rain everyone suddenly is flooded with literary inspiration. The point, however, is how true, how deep, how emotional, how exposed you can get.

Because think of the person who will read. They will want to be able to feel precisely that emotion. The pain, the anguish, the heartbeat, the torment, the painstaking ordeal. We all want the assurance that we are not alone in whatever it is we are going through. That is primarily why we read. That, and to get away from it all. From our own troubles into another world.

Imagine being able to do that through reading.

Now think of the power you could possess if you could write too.

If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads. Or better yet, date a girl who writes.” ―Rosemarie Urquico

Also part of Daily Prompt: Writing Room

Cold Black Hearts

Black black heart

 

 

 

 

 

Black clouds fill the sky
Dark as my heart.
The cold freezes the misty air.

I sit here alone
the snowflakes melting
into raindrops.

There is no warmth,
No fireplace lit. The memories
are burning.

You forgot and so easily
moved on. But my soul
is still hurting.

Shattered dreams
like broken glass
never the same again.

There is no life
in winter’s frost. No love,
no remedy.

It’s time for something
fresh. A new start.
Maybe next year.

The wolf isn’t always bad

??????????????????????????????????????Once upon a time, there were three little pigs. When they came of age and were ready to move out of the house, their parents told them that they should build strong houses to protect themselves from the big bad wolf who roamed the country and was constantly an imminent danger to them. So, to cut a long story short, the first little piggy built a straw house that was blown down by the wolf in seconds. The second little piggy built a wooden house which was also destroyed instantly by the wolf and they both ran to the third piggy who was smart enough to build a brick house which was almost impenetrable to the wolf.

“Couldn’t he get a power drill to break it down?”

“Why? Are you on the side of the wolf? He’s supposed to be the big and bad one. It’s the little piggies that you should root for!”

“Yes, but everyone deserves a fair chance…Maybe he just wanted to talk to them and be friends because he was lonely and his aggression was the only way of outing his suppressed feelings”.

“OK, Jack, let’s move on to the next story. That might put you to sleep.”

So there was a prince that the whole kingdom was proud of. And yes, in that time, such people still existed. When he became of marrying age, his father decided to hold a ball to find him a suitable princess to marry. So invitations were sent far and wide, and all the fair maidens excitedly began to prepare for the biggest night of the year.

“Oh, I know what happened! A wicked witch came the night before the ball and cursed the prince into a wolf. He had to find his princess by midnight or he would forever remain a wolf!”

“OK, that’s an interesting twist. So this Wolf Prince, then…”

“Wait, why not Prince Wolf?”

“Well, because that sounds like barking more than anything else.

So this Wolf Prince started to panic. It was a full moon that night and the King began to fear he would start to howl too. So the Queen placed a cloak over the Prince’s head because terror would ensue if people saw his real (cursed) face.

Maidens stormed into the ballroom and began their frantic attempts to conquer the heart of the Prince. But it was not easy. Especially given the mental and physical state he was now in. But it was only a few minutes before midnight, when the doors of the ballroom opened wide and a bright light came flooding into the room, causing many to cover their eyes. The Prince was mesmerized by the white figure that stood in front of the spotlight. It was a young maiden, dressed in a sparkling white ballroom dress and as she elegantly descended the steps, he saw the crystal glass slippers she was wearing. Her blonde hair, golden as the light that was accompanying her, fell gently around her shoulders. When she looked into his eyes, he knew instantly that she was the one. He had a few minutes left. So he took her hand immediately, stared into her eyes and told her “I’ve been waiting for you”, to which she softly replied “sorry I was late”.

At the sound of midnight, the Prince’s wolf form magically changed back to his charming self, as his cloak dropped while he was dancing with the new Princess of the realm. And from then on, they lived happily ever after.

Now you should go to sleep. I’ve told you two stories tonight.”

“OK, but what happened to the witch?”

“Well, nothing really. She probably went to find the wolf so that neither would be lonely anymore and they could control their evil tendencies”.

“That’s nice”, the little boy said with a smile as he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.

Fighting back Pandora’s Box

Pandora__s_Box_by_CursedCubbiesHave you ever found yourself surrounded by people, yet felt so alone? It’s as if you’re standing in the middle of a crowd, but you can see, feel or hear no-one. As if you’re encased in a vacuum, a glass case, and left feeling more lonely than you could ever be. It’s as if you’ve trapped yourself.

So how do you get out?

Sometimes it’s good to be alone. It’s actually healthy to spend periods of time alone. Doing something you want, without having anyone to disturb you. Spending time to re-engage with your own feelings, thoughts and desires.

But as the ancient Greeks admitted, humans are social beings and need to spend time around other people.

A well-known author (Jodi Picoult) wrote that loners are not alone because they enjoy solitude, no matter what they profess. They are alone “because they have tried to blend into the world before, and people continue to disappoint them.”

But being disappointed with the world is no reason to step away from it.

Disillusionment is a natural feeling in today’s world. People grow up with dreams, of how the world would be like, of how their own (ideal) world would be, and of the part they would play in it. And suddenly the harsh reality sets in, making them see that the real world isn’t all sunshine and roses. Because Pandora’s Box had a lot of grief, evil and wrong hidden inside, and that spilled onto mankind, and is still continuing to diffuse all the more. And despite efforts of some to “fix” the world, there are claims we are at a point where some things simply cannot be changed. Hope, though, shouldn’t be lost as easily. Because even the most earth-shattering tremours, eruptions, tsunamis, storms, hurricanes and tornadoes come to an end. And the sun still shines the next day.

It may be true that sometimes “we live as we dream, alone”, but more often than not we should try a little harder to shine behind the clouds…

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Cut off

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