MC's Whispers

Whispering Silences

Archive for the tag “love”

The peak of the mountain

Pete was a person of many talents. He wanted to accomplish a lot in his life but was constantly held back by his need for all his conditions to be met before moving ahead.

Sandrine was a person of many dreams, which she set into goals and worked hard to achieve them. She loved what she did and put passion into whatever she took hold of.

When they met each other they instantly clicked. It felt as if they knew each other since forever, and for some reason fate led them into each other’s path. Nothing happens by accident.

It all moved fast from there. It was natural. Seamless. With disagreements and rifts at times, but that was sort of expected too. No two lives can clasp perfectly together without jolting. Every relationship requires work; we don’t “just wake up like this”, we need the determination, willingness, and effort to make things happen.

As time passed, they both began to view life together in the future. That’s what love supposedly is, right? Looking for the same things in the same direction. And working together for them. Supporting each other. Through the good and bad times.

They had set a goal to climb a mountain and place at the very top a flag they had made together as a symbol of their commitment to each other.

The first time they tried, Sandrine found it excruciating to reach the top, and Pete pulled her up. But a few feet away, he pulled out a parachute and dropped down. Simply because it was something he always wanted to do and it was a good opportunity.

Sandrine was devastated. But they tried again.

The second time, they found that if they held each other, they could better support one another to achieve the milestone. Sandrine slipped, but when Pete tried to grab her, he glided down the slope instead.

It was disappointing for the both of them.

But they tried again. Because they knew that what they felt from the start was stronger than any mishap that occurred along the way. And if they fought as a team against it all, they would surely win.

This time Sandrine was confident they would set the flag on the top. They were ready. They had overcome all the obstacles and the peak was in sight. There was absolutely nothing rational that could destroy it all. And right when Pete was to pull out the flag from his backpack, he instead took out a sleigh, and without saying a word, trickled down the mountain like a child engulfed in a game.

Sandrine was left ghosted and lost.

He would say one thing and then act differently.

She could not understand. And he would not let her in. There was no explanation for why he would so radically change and panic when they were so close to their joint goal.

We don’t know what people think unless they tell us. But we need to accept and comprehend their side of the story. Regardless if we agree or not.

Comprehension is the key to great and honest communication.

But so is being grateful and realising the little things we have beside us. We have more than we believe, but if we don’t acknowledge them, it’ll be too late when we eventually do.

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Suspicious minds

One of the greatest problems of the contemporary world is that we’ve grown too suspicious. Of everyone and everything. Kindness is seen with disbelief, as someone wanting to deceive us or seeking something (often more expensive) in return. If someone approaches you simply with the intention of having a friendly chat, it’s like a red alarm goes off in our brain signalling caution. Whatever anyone says or does anymore is automatically perceived with severe caution and distrust.

Even during a first encounter with any potential relationship, we’re distrustful and apprehensive of everything: the words they say, their body movements, the look in their eyes; every single thing. Perhaps it’s an upshot of having been burnt too many times in the past or simply the fact that fraud and deceit are so widespread in this world where anyone can claim to be anyone and anything without any proof.

So we try to take caution.

But as we get to know people, we slowly put our guard down. Sometimes it takes a comforting smile, an honest conversation, and finding that secret button of yours that let’s them in; making you laugh. It often doesn’t take much to feel secure with someone once they win over your trust.

But then you stop being so fearful of everything. Because you think you’ll get back that love you give out; that your attention, energy, and presence will all be reciprocated. And when you’re unexpectedly hurt, you turn to ‘anthems’ like Miley Cyrus’ latest song that you can do things better on your own and take care of yourself better than anyone else can.

The truth is, however, we’re not meant to be alone. Like Aristotle said, humans are social beings. We need the company of others to survive, to evolve, to be who we are. No matter how well we cope alone, we all secretly (or not) want someone to share our life with, someone to ramble on about when we’re facing bureaucratic nonsense and are having a bad day, but also when funny and oddly good things occur too. We want someone to cuddle up with to watch a movie (even if we’ll fall asleep in the first 20 minutes of it). Someone to go on long walks with and recount what we’ve been up to; our successes as well as the adversities that we’ve encountered. We want people next to us who will console our pain during the hard times but also share our joy during the happy ones.

Despite the vicious circle of suspicion that this society has led us into, we want someone who will love, respect, and care for us, to whom we can express our soul’s desires without the fear of regretting it, and to whom we can give it all and know it will be reciprocated without ever asking for it.

In this world of distrust, we want people whom we hug and they hug us right back even tighter because they can feel that is what we need to heal our troubled hearts.

Let’s make a pact

You know those New Year resolutions we already forget in the second week of the year? Well, what if we were consistent in keeping them? Or rather, what if we set more feasible goals that were easier and more plausible to implement?

We have this hope – or expectation if you please – that what we’re doing on the first day of the year is how we’ll spend the rest of the year too. So, we put on our most elegant clothes, choose the company of our most loved ones, and try to be as happy as possible having fun. But is that illusion realistic? That we can maintain this atmosphere and emotion all 365 days through?

Life has its ups and downs and that is a reality we cannot ignore.

Stress is inevitable, as a psychiatrist friend highlights, we’re bound to be thrown off balance, but the emotional anxiety it is accompanied with is something we can be trained to manage.

When we allow ourselves to fall into unprecedented bursts of anger it’s because we’ve been suppressing too many feelings for too long, of the sentiment that our viewpoint is not being understood no matter how hard we try to explain ourselves. Panic attacks set in because we’re not able to promptly manage the stress that surrounds us. But what if we could train our minds to be as happy, calm, and serene as on that very first day of the new year? It’s not easy. But it’s not impossible either.

When something goes wrong, we are bombarded with a myriad of thoughts, mostly negative. But what we most lament is the time we lost. We feel that we are in a constant race against time in life and when things go south it’s the first thing that comes to mind and causes additional anguish. The time we allow to pass without doing the things that help us grow, things that we enjoy, being in places that calm us, being embraced and pampered by the people we love.

When we’re having fun, we don’t pay attention to how quickly time passes. When we’re not, that’s when it becomes more obvious. Because we miss things. We miss the things that bring a smile to our face, the people who make us laugh, but most of all the person we are when we’re with them.

What if we made a resolution to be stronger this year? To tolerate more but also less, to set healthy boundaries (which is always not as easy as it sounds), to laugh more and sustain yourself as best as you can?

What if we made a pact to make the most of every single passing minute?

Where the door is always open

©Fleur Lind

Family is the people you run to when your heart is broken to alleviate your sorrow when life gets too much.

Family is the people you constantly quarrel with and sometimes can’t stand, but simultaneously the ones you miss terribly when they’re away.

Family is the people who buy you scratch cards simply to see you smile when you win. The ones who take you on long walks, rambling along the way, just to make you forget your own troubles.

Family is where a door is always open for you to return because the love is unconditional. Always and forever.

Also part of Friday Fictioneers

Fireworks all year

©MCD

Do you know why we use fireworks, sparkles and bangs to welcome the New Year? It stems from centuries-old traditions that sound and light made evil spirits afraid and were thus used to ward off evil.

We too hope that by filling the final month of the year and the subsequent first of the new one with lights and glitter will help bring luck, fortune, prosperity, health and blessings to our life.

Have you noticed how we light up inside and the world seems happier with all the festive decorations during the Christmas and New Year season?

We don’t need much to be happy and bloom. But we often forget that we are the creators of our well-being and happiness.

So let’s make a resolution this year to keep ourselves as happy as we begin the new months, to spread love just as we wish to receive it, and to keep the hope alive that everything will work out for the best with new adventures lying ahead.

Happy New Year everyone!

Different is also good

© Dale Rogerson

It was going to be different. A destination none had even heard about before.

But that was the beauty of it. Exploring new places together. Boldly going where they had never been.

She didn’t mind, because she was with him.

He didn’t worry, because he was with her.

The important thing was that they would spend this time together.

And it is well known that unity makes force. With them united, they had nothing to fear.

It was different. But it was also wonderful.

Snowy and freezing outside, but warm and cosy inside.

With laughter and love to spread around.

Also part of Friday Fictioneers

Soulful soft toys

©Lisa Fox

It didn’t matter that they were old. They still encompassed the warmth with which they were given and received.

The soft toys were a symbol of affection. To those who loved them for their fluffiness and cuteness, they were so much more. A company for those moments when you want to be alone and say nothing, a consoling familiar ‘thing’ to hug and make you feel better.

They held within them the essence of the person who gifted them. Because the bearer knew well what to choose and when to deliver it.

They were hung out to dry. Refreshed, revived.

Also part of Friday Fictioneers

Letter to Santa

http://www.shieldhealthcare.com/community/grow/2017/12/21/dear-santa-letter-from-a-special-needs-parent/

As a Christmas birthday child, this season is magical for so many reasons. Mainly because it’s filled with hope, anticipation, laughter, cheer, love, and so much joy. It’s the period when it’s OK to act like a child and feel like one too. Perhaps more so than children themselves. We feel everything so intensely and the emotions that fill the air during this most wonderful time of the year are no exception.

You never get too old to rejoice in the magic of this season. The fact that it brings people together. It fills your heart with excitement, optimism, happiness, and so much love. Particularly if you get to spend it with people who mean the most to you. Because in essence, that’s what we spend all year waiting for. To celebrate the best part of it (and for some, a birthday too) with those we cherish.

We’re comfortable with being vulnerable and letting it show. Of how happy we are when we enter an elf factory, or stand under a huge lighted-up Christmas tree for a selfie, or get lost in all the seasonal decorations of a store. We don’t mind to demonstrate that side of us, because it’s a part of who we are, and it’s contagious too. Admit it, you can’t not smile at a (small-sized) Christmas-obsessed person camouflaged as an elf among large decorations and rejoicing so much that everything else seems trivial.

Christmas makes us all kids at heart. So, it doesn’t matter how many we’ve experienced, we seize the opportunity to write a letter to Santa. It’s just that we don’t ask for toys anymore. We ask for moments, people, and emotions. We ask that nothing be taken away from us. We express the urge for love, serenity, and happiness. For things to work out as we deserve. For our heart’s desires to be fulfilled.

When we start writing “Dear Santa”, it all magically becomes clear; what it is that we truly want, what matters most, and what’s important for us.

Writing a letter to Santa brings back that innocence we lose as we grow up, that belief that we have that the world will be as magical as we dream it. It reminds us that what we dream we can create, and what we imagine we can be, as long we have an open heart and mind…and just believe.

Facing the world

© Sandra Crook

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Sure? We can…”

“No.”

The response was absolute. She’d rather be alone. It was just one of those days when she couldn’t quite decipher what was wrong.

He gave her a couple of hours.

Then he pulled her into a tight embrace – he knew this relieved her tension and said “let’s go.” He allowed no opportunities for questions. They weren’t important. And it didn’t matter.

About an hour later, they arrived.

It was the quiet place where their first date developed. It served as a reminder that it was them against the world.

Also part of Friday Fictioneers

Genuine Smiles

https://i.pinimg.com/736x/25/d3/d2/25d3d255b0f902af8beb9ca92c60127f.jpg

There was a difference between when she smiled wholeheartedly and when she simply forced it. Her aunt knew how to read her. She was just like her. The fake smile caused more muscles to tense. It was strained and didn’t seem natural.

We all have moments like that. When we feel obligated to smile and be courteous when in fact we feel nothing like it at all.

Charlotte saw so much of herself in her niece. Joy lived up to her name most times. But when her aura clouded, it could be sensed a mile away.

“The secret to maintaining that smile is to keep the child inside you alive”, Charlotte said.

Joy tilted her face like a cat in awe.

Think about it: when we’re simply living in that moment, blurring everything around us to the point that nothing else exists beyond what we’re doing and who we’re with at the present time, aren’t we happier? We shift all our focus to that precise period of time that we don’t care about past or future or anything else that causes us concern and stress. We feel relaxed, playful, carefree, and genuinely happy. Your heart is open to love and…well, joy, and your mind is thinking positively by default. You view the world brighter because you’ve turned the mood switch to that direction”.

Joy smiled, her head turned back straight. The smile was authentic this time.

She didn’t need to say much. Charlotte understood anyway. She gave her a hug. One of those long ones where you wait for the other person to let go first and so you stay entangled for what seems like hours, laughing while you feel each other’s heart vibrate. The embrace was so tight, Charlotte could actually feel the crack that had marked Joy’s emotions.

We’re all loving people the way we wish we were loved and hurting them the way we wish we were not hurt”.

How different the world would be if we could – even for an instance – see things from another’s point of view, step in their shoes and view their perspective. How much better everything would be, if we could just let our pride aside for a minute and show some empathy to the people around us, particularly to those we say we care for the most”.

Sometimes, love has a way of coming back to you”, Charlotte added, loosening the squeeze.

If it’s meant to be, it won’t miss you. There is always a way if we truly want it”.

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