MC's Whispers

Whispering Silences

Archive for the tag “reflections”

Cursed to feel

https://secure.static.tumblr.com/5332aa58d90d1b62cdcfb76b42e2fc3a/uhqpxjc/kAgn1552y/tumblr_static_dark_rose_by_darkblade221-d3fa2xy.jpgIt may be a sign of determination; of decisiveness; sometimes even stubbornness. But it may also be one of insecurity; often even fear. When we set our minds on something and stick to it; when we ponder too much over it; when we refuse to simply let it go. It’s what adds to the stress of our daily lives and disrupts our pleasant mood for no apparent reason.

As difficult as it may be, we need to train ourselves to let some things slide. Especially those we most fear. Because it is true that the greatest things will happen when we distance ourselves from negativity. It’s not about pretending that you don’t care; it’s about getting over it and paying more attention to the things that really matter.

We are cursed to feel. As much as we may love and laugh and live, feeling is the most profound of all experiences we have. And the deeper you feel, the more you overthink, you overanalyze, you stress, and you worry.

It was Oprah Winfrey who said “if you look at what you have in life, you’ll always have more. If you look at what you don’t have in life, you’ll never have enough”.

Everything is a matter of perspective, of focus and what you (choose to) hold onto.

Lost in a horizon

http://wpnature.com/moonlight-horizon-light-stones-clouds-moon-night-beach-wallpaper-with-sky-blue-background/Sometimes there are moments when you have nothing to say. There are people who go through such moments, and others who never experience them at all. The former are often the ones who know that sometimes silence is worth so much more than blabber. And it is often them that get lost in their thoughts, staring out the window into the horizon, allowing their mind to drift.

It is in those moments that you allow your soul to relax, to breathe, to regenerate itself.

Because it is in those moments that you enable the storm inside you to cool down.

On days that begin with sun, then bringing on clouds, rain, storms, thunder, hail, to return to sun, and repeat the cycle; that is when you need to be quiet the most. To take it all in and to admire the forces of nature that more often than not reflect our own emotions.

It is said that unless what you have to say is better than silence, then be quiet. Wouldn’t the world be so much better without all the useless noise pollution? Wouldn’t we all be calmer and more serene rather than the nervous wrecks we have (been forced) to become?

Just think about it for a minute. In silence.

That sense of Spring

https://lh6.ggpht.com/3Z9IXTyeb56d_T01p0zMpADNHlaeu0GKw8rseQRKYJWjCXdmtIOS_9WjQLa_-pr_Kg=h900It’s when the first warm rays of sun slice through your window that it strikes you. When that warmth diffusing into your skin and you turn your head to view a clear blue sky. That is when you feel it. How exhausted you are from not stopping even a minute to just…breathe.

When the birds begin to sing louder and in a greater chorus; when light and music overwhelms your living space; when you open the doors and windows to welcome in the fresh air; when colour takes over more of the day; and when everything seems so much more vivid and more alive, that is when you know Spring has come.

And you feel it inside you too. That need to relax a bit, to do something different, to get away even for a few hours. You see it around you – cabriolet cars and motorbikes start to appear more often, walks on the beach become the norm, and people are overtaken by the urge to sit outside and soak up the sun.

It all becomes more vivid in Spring. That sense that we should be grateful to be alive and that we should be relishing each and every moment we have.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Vivid

The loudness of insecurity

girl-umbrellaIt was the first time Max had found himself in a psychologist’s office. He was postponing it for too long; he needed someone to listen to all the things that had accumulated inside him and were causing him stomach aches. The main problem he had to face was that he cared too much – he over-thought and over-worried about anything. Maybe this doctor would be able to show him how to care less, or at least how to not allow things to affect him as much.

Outside in the waiting room was a sign on the wall, a blue canvas with the inscription “Confidence is silent. Insecurities are loud.” It resonated with Max, as he thought about all the people in his life who annoyed him the most and who he wrongly permitted to distress him – they were all people who claimed center stage, those who thought that everything should be about them, who adopted an attitude close to that of a bully, and who pretended to mask their low self-esteem in (often overly) socialization.

For an hour, Max poured out his feelings to the person he had just met sitting across him in the small, yet cozy, room. He found himself telling him stories and emotions that he had never even admitted to himself. Psychologists, he realised, have a way of making you feel comfortable enough to share your inner most thoughts without dwelling too much on what you’re saying.

When the psychologist’s turn to talk came, Max took out a small notebook to write certain things down. They may have been just phrases, but they would help him in changing his own attitude and facing the situations he was forced to deal with on a daily basis.

“Insecurity is an ugly thing. It makes you hate people you don’t even know. More so, insults are the last resort of insecure people with a crumbling position trying to appear confident. Insecure people seek approval. They try to talk everyone down so that can feel superior. Don’t allow yourself to fall into that trap. Try, as much as you can to ignore them. Just don’t interfere in their lives so that they won’t interfere in yours. Remember, you only give them more power the more attention you devote to them. So simply turn the other way. Demonstrate your own confidence by shying away from the spotlight; let it chase you, not the other way round. Do something different instead: build people up, remind them they’re worthy, tell them they’re incredible; be a light in an often too dim world”.

Max left the office feeling uplifted. Sometimes, all it takes is some words of encouragement to view the situation in a different aspect.

The human weakness

https://trans4mind.com/quotes/reflect.jpgHere’s how it goes; if you want a pep talk, then you’ll have to learn to swallow the truth: No-one cares what’s going on in your life. They don’t care if you’re sick, if you’re tired, if you have personal problems, work difficulties, or whatever. They don’t even care if they call and are interrupting you from something, or if they send you a message and are disturbing you. They don’t care if the time you devote to them means that you’re missing out on your own time, which you could have spent doing something else. No-one cares about all that. All they care about is getting what they want from you.

Everybody has their own business to attend to. Everyone has their own path to follow, but that doesn’t mean it is the same for everyone. That is what we need to acknowledge and understand. Because it is said that successful people never worry about what others are doing. What you should worry about, is doing whatever it is your doing right. Like Paolo Coelho says, “We can never judge the life of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It’s one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it’s another to think that yours is the only path”.

Humans have an inherent and unalterable weakness: they are, by nature, selfish. What they care about is themselves: how to further their own interests, how to achieve their own goals, regardless of whom or what they trample on. And to add to that, they are greedy. They always want more and nothing is ever enough.

If you can master these two characteristics: if you can teach yourself to care about the lives of others too, to be more sympathetic to their own needs, and to realise that you don’t know their story or what they’re going through; if you can convince yourself that things could always be worse – you could have nothing – then you will become a better person. And if you can pass this on so that more people can become better, then that is how society will improve.

Be positive and smile, even when things don’t seem to go your way. Even that slight gesture may change someone’s world.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Recognize

The dormant volcano

http://68.media.tumblr.com/0b5d1d9d6c6d056be04a1efe82fe3d23/tumblr_nyctmaipGq1sgn87so1_1280.jpg

They say that you never truly develop unless you face what you fear. Because you can never truly know what you’re capable of unless you’re forced to deal with circumstances you never thought you could survive from. To allow yourself to get exposed to the risks you fear of taking.

It’s when you realise that you hide much more inside than even you yourself thought was possible. When you acknowledge that a person will only find their limits when they push themselves towards them. Or like Eleanor Roosevelt said, “you must do the thing you think you cannot do”. And just like the fact that you cannot grow unless you are willing to change, and sometimes even surpass the things you fear, there are certain circumstances – or even people – that bring out the best in you.

We all have emotions, abilities, potential, that is hidden, dormant, within, waiting for the right inspiration, time, person to surface, to be awakened and expressed. It’s how you grow and evolve into who you want to be and who you can be.

It’s how you become a better version of who you are.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Exposure

The homeless keyowner

http://gretchenrubin.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/keyswhere.jpgWhen Oralia was a young girl, her grandmother had given her a set of keys as a present. She told her that she would spend all her life trying to find a lock, so she might as well be prepared. Oralia didn’t really understand what it meant, but she was proud to own something so significant.

When she grew up, she had the habit of carrying with her sets of keys – be it for her home, the storage room, the office, even her closet doors. For some reason it made her feel important, granting her a sense that she was responsible for something so significant.

When the economic crisis broke out and homeless people began to appear more abundantly in the city streets, Oralia was saddened by the thought that apart from not having a roof over their head, these people didn’t own any keys.

One day, however, the unimaginable happened to her. She got locked out of her own house. And she couldn’t find the keys.

She had left her precious set of keys on her desk at the office that evening, when in a rush to get home, change and meet her friends at the movie theatre. The office door locked automatically and she was not the last to leave, so she was not concerned about that. But when she reached the front door of her apartment building, she felt her blood freeze in her veins.

City life was so asocial and distant that she didn’t even know any of her neighbours who could buzz her in. But even if she did get into the building she couldn’t enter the apartment. And she would have to call a locksmith to change every lock, from the apartment door, to even the closets so she could access her belongings. It was a nightmare she would rather not even think of.

So she decided to go back to the office instead and retrieve her original set of keys.

On the way, she saw two homeless people, one snuggled in a quilted blanket on a park bench and one sitting at the steps in front of another tall apartment building.

She no longer felt sorry for them not having a set of keys. It wasn’t the keys themselves that made them important; it was what they unlocked. And that is what her grandmother meant all those years ago.

RSVP

http://ichef.bbci.co.uk/wwfeatures/wm/live/624_351/images/live/p0/2k/4q/p02k4qwr.jpgWhen sent a form of communication – be it an email, an SMS, an instant message, a written letter, a pigeon, a Morse code or smoke signals – it is always good manners to respond. Regardless of whether there was a direct question involved.

The same implies for when someone is addressing you with an issue of some sort. Maybe they want your opinion on something, maybe they are asking for your input, or maybe they simply want to share their experience with you. But in all cases, they expect that you will respond in some sort of way.

Otherwise, if you don’t even have the courtesy to nod in acknowledgement that you are registering what they’re saying, it is easy to misunderstand or rather, conclude (either rightly or wrongly), that the other person is simply not interested.

If you care enough, you find the means, the time, and the way to respond.

The French have even globalised a polite abbreviation for it – Répondez S’il Vous Plait (RSVP). OK, you might not really want to respond to something, but it is merely polite to simply acknowledge receipt of the communication and fire up a minimum five-word response. It takes up much more of your time trying to edit a photo to upload on social media, or scrolling through social networking sites.

It is a shame that in the so-called digital era all this technology has in fact made us so anti-social.

The wrong turn

https://debuggirl.files.wordpress.com/2013/03/img_43081.jpgElaine knew it the moment she stepped in the door. It was the wrong turn. The wrong decision she had taken. A bad choice. But she had now crossed into it and there was nothing she could do to change it. She just had to survive not being perfect for once.

All her life she was raised to live up to other people’s expectations. And more. She was the one who had to know how to dress right, to behave properly, to be kind and courteous no matter the person or the occasion.

But today, she had chosen unwisely. She chose to go against her instinct and it turned out to be wrong. But she had to experience this too. It would be the only way she would go stronger and wiser for the next time she encountered a similar dilemma.

We often take the wrong turn so that we are more certain when the choice comes in the future to take the right one instead.

In anticipation

http://www.ldssmile.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/12/maps-of-all-the-Christmas-lights-in-utah.jpgWith Christmas just a week away, and the New Year a few days to go, we all seem to have something to be waiting for. (I have something more due to my birthday too next week). The lights in the street and the brightly lit houses, the decorations, the fancy atmosphere…they all emit a feeling that something wonderful is about to happen. So we wait…we wait and anticipate that in that one or two days that we celebrate, we will be recompensed for all the hardship the year has brought.

We wait and expect that suddenly this wonderful time of the year will lighten our mood and brighten our lives. Because in essence we need to believe that things will turn out as brightly as the decorations we load upon our houses. We need the optimism of the season in order to survive.

But we spend almost an entire month, if not more, counting down in anticipation of literally just one day that will pass by quicker than we’ll realise. We wait, sometimes forgetting that life is composed of “nows”, those everyday moments that make up our memories. Those experiences that we share with loved ones, which forge who we are and who we want to become.

It is said that good things are worth waiting for, but also that good things don’t last long. The truth is, we also need to try; to put in the effort so that those good things come along a little bit faster and last a bit longer.

In the end, life is what we make of it. And it is how we chose to see it and experience it.

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