MC's Whispers

Whispering Silences

Archive for the tag “optimism”

When things go wrong

cat-tigerThings are bound to get rough. It’s a fact of life. Nothing is perfect all the time. There comes a moment when things will go wrong. And sometimes, too many things go wrong for too long. But like Charles R. Swindoll said, “life is 10% what happens to you and 90% of how you react to it”.

There are days when you won’t want to get out of bed, out of fear that something (even more) terrible will happen. Days when you’re overcome by negative thoughts, when you’re convinced that someone cast a spell on you – the neighbour, the person who competes with you for a parking spot, those others who are always jealous of you but hypocritically act as if they’re happy for you. And somehow, your mood drops, you don’t feel like doing anything, seeing anyone or even getting out of the house. Because you know that when one thing goes wrong, a whole lot of others will follow. And they usually do. Something breaks that you can’t fix; your computer gives up on you; you lose your lucky charm that you’ve had for years.

They say there is a reason things happen. You just never find out what it is.

But what you need to force yourself to do is to abandon the negative thoughts. Being negative attracts negativity. And in the same sense, being positive will turn things around. Try to smile and the sun will shine a little brighter. But most of all, surround yourself people who offer more than sympathy. People who will embrace you, look out for you and persuade you that there are things in life worth being grateful for. And if something goes wrong now, it’s because something even better is on its way.

You just have to believe.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Sympathy

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High bars

https://www.metalmulisha.com/2016/05/26/matt-buyten-trains-moto-x-step/

©Chris Tedesco

She stepped out of the train and slowly walked up to the escalator. For some reason she didn’t really want to rush like she always did. The thoughts had flooded her mind. Scenarios that may never be fulfilled. Wouldn’t it be great, she thought, if he was already there, waiting for her? But that wouldn’t happen. She already dismissed it from her mind. She walked out hurriedly heading towards the traffic lights, crossed the street, lost in her thoughts. And then she heard someone talking to her, a familiar voice that said “Honey, I’m calling you, but you won’t listen”. She turned and there he was, smiling as if nothing had been broken. He was there, waiting for her.

Now she was expecting the door to open and see him walking in. She turned her head every time a sound was heard, her heart beating faster. But it was always some stranger. Then the time came, the bells rang and she had to leave.

He didn’t come. And reality hit her hard.

Because things like that only happen in movies, not in real life.

The problem with setting the bar too high is that the higher up it is, the more it hurts when it falls.

It happens in an instance. Like the tremours of a violent earthquake during a vicious storm devastating everything in its passage.

As with everything in life, we all have expectations of how things will turn out to be. We dream and hope that it will all be realised in that idyllic way we have formulated in our head.

But they don’t always. Hardly ever. Rarely so.

Our expectations become illusions. Unfulfilled dreams of what could have been.

They say things happen for a reason. But you never truly get to find out what the reason is. You are only granted a glimpse of it when it no longer matters.

And your love becomes hate, but deep down it’s actually sorrow of time lost spent not being happy.

You end up disappointed when you realise that people don’t do for you what you do for them. Not everyone has the same heart as yours.

We set the bars high because we want people to prove us wrong, that there can be those who care enough to try harder and persist. We raise our expectations in the hope of finding the people who will intensify their performance to meet them, who will do what best they can to make them a reality.  In the end, you shouldn’t be sorry for having high standards; people who really want to be in your life will rise up to meet them.

“The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short, but in setting our aim too low and achieving our mark” – Michelangelo Buonarroti

The load we carry

https://userscontent2.emaze.com/images/4669297c-d643-4dda-ac3f-b8c0aff979b2/67f85e5251c50b6c1e5307c671be83f1.pngTry to relax”. The voice was hoarse yet soothing. It had the tone of wisdom possessed by a mature person struck by many misfortunes in life. It was only fitting the Dr Hasbland would become a psychiatrist. He had been through so much – loss of loved persons, divorces, legal battles, evictions, foul play. He had seen a lot and experienced so much more than what his patients recounted.

Sergio was a special case. He went through extreme mood swings. The type where he could burst into anger and be tempted to light everything up in flames so as to cause as much destruction as possible, or where he would sit silently hidden from the world, pondering the vanity of it all as he could not contain the tears running from his eyes. It was a type of bipolar disorder, but only so much worse. Dr Hasbland had witnessed it first-hand in his office.

“Focus on one spot. Do you see the whirlwind? Look into that and try to free your mind. Forget everything that is bothering you and try not to think about anything for now. Relax”.

They had tried a lot of counselling and recommendations, but none of it seemed to work. It would only minimise the frequency of the mood swings, not their essence.

Hypnosis was the last resort. Dr Hasbland was certain this bipolar-ism was a consequence of a childhood trauma.

And he was right.

Because in the hypnosis, Sergio awakened a beast. One that remembered how he was mistreated as a child but blackmailed into not saying anything ever, and how that ordeal stayed with him, scarring his very psyche and causing him to become so extremely paranoid at times. He had to say it out loud, all that he had been through, so he could release his soul of the burden he was carrying for so long.

When he awoke, Sergio remembered nothing. But he felt lighter. In some way relieved. The mood swings soon disappeared and he managed to take on a different approach to life. One more positive, where he would see the brightness of things and not the bad that could come from them. It is the things we carry with us that cause the most damage in the end.

Roots and wings

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/99/a8/52/99a85230057e9941cb6b01a6ba3711e3--black-tree-art-prints.jpgThere is a saying, “if you don’t like where you are, move; you are not a tree”. People were meant to move around, to explore, to evolve. Instead, with the passing of time, we have become so afraid of change that we fear the slightest disturbance of our known environment. We become rooted in one place, often because we don’t have the courage to risk and see what more is out there.

And as such, we close our minds to everything around us. We refuse to accept anything different to our own perceptions, or consider something further from our beliefs.

We become so accustomed to routine, that any turbulence to it is considered lethal; when in fact, it is the other way around.

We encage ourselves in a life that shrinks us and diminishes us instead of helping us grow and develop. We aren’t making ourselves better, rather, we persevere in a mediocrity and preserve a life unchanged, with the same mentality and the same lens on life.

But what we fail to see, is that as we grow, our surroundings change, our needs become different, and so do our characters. We have a different perspective on life when we are young, springing into the world, compared to when we are mature, looking back at it.

After all, we are supposed to receive and pass on two gifts: roots to remind you where you are from, and wings to show what you can become. It is only when you use the latter that you discover where you can go.

Complaining, whining, nagging

http://rbk.h-cdn.co/assets/cm/14/50/548a5ac82c9a3_-_rbk-nagging-0612-1-xln.jpgWe tend to complain. A lot. And the ‘we’ goes to the human species. Because no other animal has the tendency to complain, whine or nag as much as we do.

We often complain so much because we’re too afraid to act. We fear that we might not be able to change circumstances, that there is nothing we can do to make things better. We complain because we don’t believe enough in our own strength and capabilities.

Then again, we too often complain because we feel we deserve better.

We nag because we want things to be done a certain way, usually different to the current one, and we are irritated and agitated if this does not coincide with the notion in our minds.

Motivational speech includes prompts to stop complaining and appreciate things more. To be willing to change and adopt a more positive aspect on life. After all, aren’t optimists the ones who see the glass half-full and a silver lining in everything?

Complaining places you in the position of a victim as it is a sign you do not have control of a situation. It also causes you to waste (valuable) time. Instead, “champions never complain; they are too busy getting better” (John Wooden).

But in the end it all comes down to how good you feel within you and about yourself.

The happiest people don’t have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything”.

Different Worlds

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/--g6b8vGj14Y/VLw7moMN3yI/AAAAAAABjA4/RSkmWC0MZ70/s1600/Lady%2Band%2BTramp%2Bspaghetti.jpgThere is a saying that opposites attract. Like the opposing ends of a magnet drawn onto each other.

But there is also the belief that people need to match in order to suit each other, to be able to communicate on the same level and see things in the same perspective.

That is not necessarily true.

There is a reason why The Lady and The Tramp worked out despite being nothing alike. Being from different backgrounds and levels, they found that they completed each other. Because having grown up differently, with other kinds of experiences and views on life, that “other”, the person so astoundingly opposite to you – as it seems – has an entirely inverse perspective. One that does not necessarily contradict yours, but rather, comes to complete it.

It would be truly boring if we all had the same beliefs, opinions and views on life. There would be nothing to push us to grow, to learn, to improve, to become better at life itself. There would be nothing to show us another side to reality and to dreams.

We need that ‘different’ in our lives because it is what makes us more unique.

And sometimes, it is through that contrast that we find something that completes us.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Magnet

Maintaining excitement in a habit

https://www.google.gr/imgres?imgurl=http%3A%2F%2Fwallpaperswide.com%2Fdownload%2Fsunshine_ocean-wallpaper-1920x1080.jpg&imgrefurl=http%3A%2F%2Fwallpaperswide.com%2Fsunshine_ocean-wallpapers.html&docid=WNfqtZR1VjNxJM&tbnid=373bY1gb-WukrM%3A&vet=10ahUKEwiQ7-L17brUAhXDtBQKHXF2D9o4ZBAzCD4oPDA8..i&w=1920&h=1080&bih=554&biw=1252&q=sunshine&ved=0ahUKEwiQ7-L17brUAhXDtBQKHXF2D9o4ZBAzCD4oPDA8&iact=mrc&uact=8#h=1080&imgdii=kuvntzjULNNgWM:&vet=10ahUKEwiQ7-L17brUAhXDtBQKHXF2D9o4ZBAzCD4oPDA8..i&w=1920We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit”, said Aristotle. As such, the quality of the life we live is found in something we do routinely. Without thinking, without pondering too much over it.

Consider this: the majority of the things we do every day is simply habit: the ‘good morning’ and ‘good evening’ greetings we exchange; checking the mailbox when we leave/enter our house; even checking-in on social media or taking a daily selfie. They are all things we do often unconsciously. Things that we find natural.

Entrepreneur Jim Rohn said that “motivation is what gets you going. Habit is what keeps you there”. Having a healthy breakfast; working out often; reading a book once in a while; devoting time to rest and de-stress – they are all things we include in our lives after we do them over and over again.

But the one thing about a habit is that often – even the things we say – occur so automatically they sometimes lose their very essence. We need to ensure that we still mean what we say, no matter how many times we utter it; that we are still as excited as the first time we go on a run; that the breakfast we eat every day is as tasty as the first time we had it. If we can keep that excitement, enthusiasm and enthrallment alive, we have found the road to happiness. Even if staying on that road has become a habit.

Searching for that lost…thing

motivation catWhen your personal trainer tells you “good job” you’re motivated to last a little longer, to try a little harder, to take your limits a bit further.

We all need that encouragement. It’s a boost to reach further than you think you can.

But, similarly, we all need the acknowledgement of a job well done. A recognition of your efforts, be it in the form of a verbal gratification, a written thank you or a monetary compensation.

We need the demonstration of feelings to be satisfied with our own selves. Because just as we often cannot hide what emotion is overwhelming us, in the same context, we would like to be shown that we are admired, sympathized, liked, loved, or even despised. But we want to be clear of what we have to face.

Once in a while, it happens to all of us, though. Losing your motivation or will to do anything creative. And no matter where you search for it, one thing is certain: you’ll never find it unless it comes from within you. Unless you start to do something that’s yours, that expresses you and fulfills you.

Remember, you only fail when you stop trying.

The surprise bomb

https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0031/8592/products/Mystery-box-Black-closed-David-Blaine.jpg?v=1493223671Don’t touch that!” The fire chief yelled as he ran towards Levi. The latter raised his glance in fright and froze in place. Wasn’t this what he was trained to do? To prevent bombs from detonating?

The fire chief raced to Levi’s position, gasping for air as his glove-covered hands passed over the black box. His fingers barely came into contact with it, but he was already trembling as if the lives of thousands of people who worked in that building depended on it.

All residents and employees of the tower had been evacuated and for the past twenty minutes, it was only the fire fighters and bomb squad who were found within those walls. They could feel the time ticking menacingly away and with every second that fled, they felt their breath grow shorter.

This was the fire chief’s ultimate act. He was going into retirement the very next day. This was his last mission. But it was Levi’s first. As experienced and as calm as the chief was, Levi was exactly the contrary, trying to masque his anguish and fear through a calm demise.

The fire chief opened the box with fingers shaking and sweat dripping from his forehead. He didn’t know what to expect – it could be anything, from a ticking bomb to a mere post-it informing of a prank. He wished it would be the latter. But instead, inside the box he found a smaller black box, and inside that, another even smaller. His temperature began to rise as his cheeks flushed. Levi looked on with eyes wide open. He could feel his heart pumping eager to beat out of his chest.

The fire chief took the smallest box in his hand and with a move worthy of a surgeon carefully opened it. Inside was a cupcake. That’s right. A small muffin-sized cake with icing on top. He examined it on all sides and was assured that it was a harmless dessert. That is when he finally lifted his gaze.

His men were standing around him, giggling and waiting for his reaction. It took him a while to figure it out. They had surprised him with one last adrenaline-rush. But all this was, was a farewell party.

Levi smiled. If only all bomb detonation missions would be as easy and happy-ended as this one.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Detonate

The blue ball

sad_blue_eye_by_emilyeggplantImagine the sensors inside your head as a small ball that light up according to the emotion you feel. Think, for example, that when you’re excited, happy, positive, the ball lights up yellow, shining brightly and illuminating your entire brain and thus essence. But when you’re sad, that ball becomes blue.

Although associated with serenity and calmness, blue is also often linked to sadness. And when the ball in our head turns blue, that is usually when the waterworks begin, when the tears fall sometimes even without you truly knowing why.

It is much harder to change the colour of the blue ball into something else than any other colour transformation. But often times it is necessary to offer yourself some sense of reprieve. To allow yourself to get rid of the blue ball and its negativity that brings you down.

We need the colour in our lives, to enable ourselves to change moods for our own psychological sanity. It is not often easy. But balls are made to roll.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Reprieve

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