Redefining

©MCD

Sometimes getting lost isn’t a bad thing. It’s a way of finding something new. Of discovering alternative routes. Desires you didn’t know you had. A passion that was underlying for so long.

Sometimes disappearing is a way of re-finding yourself.

It’s a way of setting new priorities, of clearing out the field, of acknowledging what and who matters most. It’s a manner of redefining life and yourself. Of getting to choose how you spend your time.

It’s only when you stop that you can truly acknowledge what you have.

And it’s only when you get lost that you can find things anew.

Walk before you run

When we don’t want to accept something – usually because in our minds we pictured it all too differently – we face resistance. We’re essentially fighting ourselves; that inner battle you hear so much about. It’s what silently eats you up and wears you down. It’s the reason you can’t find the desire, courage or inspiration to do anything. Because you’re so exhausted from fighting against your own thoughts.

When your heart and mind are not in sync, you cannot find peace. And if you’re not serene, you cannot sleep. And if you’re not rested, you won’t have the energy to do pretty much anything. There is a logical consequence here that you will only be able to see once you admit you’re falling apart. It’s the first step to let go and pull yourself back together.

But that’s the most difficult one to take.

The first step is always usually the hardest.

But if you learn to walk, you’ll soon be able to run.

Guide to life

How easily things turn around: from the words you say to the actions you actually do.

The key to avoid the consequential mood swings and disappointment is to have no expectations.

Only believe what you see not what you are told.

Make that your guide.

Also part of Weekend Writing Prompt #345

Never show weakness

“Don’t show your weakness. People will often use it against you.” The advice seemed more like a warning.

The martial arts teacher often used his tips as life hacks.

“If you show them you care too much, there will come a time – often when you least expect it – that this empathy will become your downfall.

“You need to be strong. Grind your teeth if you must, but show no pain. Let your emotions pour out when you’re alone.

“But never show your vulnerability. More often than not people will tend to manipulate you with it.

“The only way to power through any situation is to act with your brain and not your heart.”

Courage

In life, we need a few things to survive, more to become successful, and a basic one to achieve both. Courage is an essential characteristic that serves us in every way possible.

We need courage to take the first step in going anywhere.

Courage to be able to stand out from the crowd and to dare to be different.

We need to have the courage to walk away from those not bold enough to give us reasons to stay.

Courage to realise that we often hold the keys to our future.

Timing may be a factor in most things, but the choices are ultimately our own.

We build the lives we have and want by the choices we make, the priorities we set, and the work we’re willing to do in every aspect of our daily routines.

We have the power to forge our own way if only we also have the courage to act on what we say.

“Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says, ‘I will try again tomorrow’.” – Mary Anne Radmacher

Music and Lyrics

Have you noticed that when you’re in a happy mood you hear the music when listening to a song, but when you’re sad you focus on the lyrics?

It’s part of the concept that you concentrate most on what you need at each moment. In a light-hearted state, you feel the rhythm that will often get you dancing; that’s why you also prefer cheerful tunes. But when you’re depressed, feeling down and rather miserable, you often listen to melancholic melodies that touch upon the strings of your broken heart.

When we’re sad we look for the words that will soothe our fragmented souls. That’s usually why we listen to the lyrics of the songs. Why we chose the ones that speak of heartbreak and the like. That’s why when we’re excited, we pump up the volume to uplifting music.

Everything essentially comes down to the state we’re in at any given moment. Not every instant entails the same mood. And that’s very much OK.

If you can’t find Spring

“And if Spring arrives and it’s cloudy and drizzly?”

“‘If you can’t find spring, you make it’, as the great Greek poet Elytis said.”

“How?”

“One little step, one colourful thought, one bright action at a time.”

We often tend to make things more difficult than they are. We allow our imagination to override our rationale and we make mountains out of molehills, fearing the worst, instead of envisioning the best case scenarios.

If we control our mindsets, we may be able to spring up our daily lives too, one sunny day at a time.

Imagine that

©MCD

Imagine if we had the courage to say everything we wanted to each other without the fear that we would be misunderstood.

Imagine feeling as loved and appreciated as we desired.

Imagine if everything we imagined turned out to be real.

But what if instead of imagining we tried to live it all?

What if we truly listened to each other without criticism or prejudice?

What if we dismissed the negative thoughts that overtake our minds and expect more joy and accept less pain?

Wouldn’t it all be easier that way?

Wouldn’t it be more peaceful?

Would it not relieve all doubt and make it all worthwhile?

Just imagine that.

The problem with dreams

We dream of escapes. We dream of travelling to places that look nothing like what we’re used to. We dream of changing it all even for a few hours or only days.

We dream a lot but perhaps live too little.

And that’s our problem.

We convince ourselves from infants that we can do anything; that we can dream big and achieve it all. But growing up we place so many constraints on ourselves. We keep waiting for the right time, the right place, the right circumstance, the right company, and we keep delaying the happiness of realising our imagined lives.

How different would everything be if we often acted on a whim, hoping for the best, instead of calculating everything that could go wrong?

How much lighter would our minds be if we cancelled all the thoughts and just ‘went for it’ once in a while?

How better could life be if instead of simply dreaming, we could live every moment, too?

Your most important ally

Why do we act like we do? It is a question that has troubled people throughout the ages – from philosophers, writers, sociologists, and psychologists, to modern therapists of all sorts. Why do we behave in certain ways? What triggers us to give resonance to certain thoughts and thinking motives over others? Why do we allow our minds to take so much control of our emotional reactions? What leaves us powerless before our own selves?

Taking charge of oneself is not an easy task. It requires you to understand yourself first. To come to terms with who you are, what affects you and why, and what you can do about it. It necessitates a process of observation above all. To realise first what is happening, to then accept it, and to often forgive yourself for it. We need to be kinder to ourselves, to talk ourselves up instead of down, to treat ourselves like the royalty that we are and to lift ourselves higher than we very often do.

Once we offer ourselves the value we deserve, and acknowledge it too, everything will change – both inside and outside. Because once you can deal with your internal turbulence, the exterior circumstances will seem a breeze. Things will affect you less and certainly not with the same force or attracting the same demeanour on your part. You will be able to allow things to slide and just accept that some things just are as such and there is not much you can do to control them. But even that is OK.

It’s all good if you first and foremost feel good inside.