MC's Whispers

Whispering Silences

Archive for the tag “sadness”

This too shall pass

flowing riverThere is a story that an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: “And this, too, shall pass away“. It manages to express a lot – caution in the hour of pride and console in times of pain.

Our times are more in need of this phrase than ever. Because everything can change in a second. Joy and sadness alternate like a spinning wheel and – with everything at our feet – it is easy to get carried away, to exhilarate or to despair.

We might have been convinced that good things don’t last long so we should relish every moment we have. But the truth is, the really good things only last as long as you put in the effort for them to, as long as you keep trying and keep holding on to them.

Whatever it is, this too shall pass. So will we. There is thus no use in being miserable; instead, we should look to make the best out of every situation.  After all, what’s the point of being here if you don’t at least try to do something remarkable and above all be happy?

 

When things are bad, remember:

It won’t always be this way.

Take one day at a time.

When things are good, remember:

It wont’ always be this way.

Enjoy every great moment.

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What starts the waterworks

https://www.google.gr/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=2ahUKEwiQgt7ly7XaAhUGMewKHd9oCq4QjRx6BAgAEAU&url=http%3A%2F%2Fdowhatlightsyouup.com%2Fgo-ahead-and-cry%2F&psig=AOvVaw1xo_TxfeVgsIFS-Yukag8-&ust=1523651732943075It is a small drop that forms at the corner of your eyelid. One that soon blurs your vision and causes your eyes to well up, releasing droplets to slide down your cheek. Then another comes and you are suddenly found in a state of distress, be it emotional or reflexive. But what is it that causes these waterworks to start? And why is it that some of us cry so much more often and easier than others?

There are reportedly three kinds of tears. According to this very interesting article our body produces basal, reflex and psychic tears. “Your basal tears are what I like to call the ‘worker tears’ and they keep your cornea (the transparent front of your eye) nourished and lubricated so your eyes don’t dry out. Then there are your reflex tears which that help you to wash out any irritations to your eyes from foreign particles or vapours (onion, being the classic example)”. Finally, there are the most popular type of tears: the “psychic, or ‘crying’ tears. These are the tears produced in response to that strong emotion you may experience from stress, pleasure, anger, sadness and suffering to indeed, physical pain. Psychic tears even contain a natural painkiller, called leucine enkephalin – perhaps, part of the reason why you might feel better after a good cry!”

When we cry, we don’t just become dehydrated and – literally – drained. There are more things that happen at the same time: your heart rate increases, you sweat, your breathing slows and you may even get a lump in your throat – known as the globus sensation. This is all believed to occur as a result of your sympathetic nervous system (your ‘fight or flight’ system) activating in response to your emotional situation. This is also why we are left so tired after a good cry. Yet we somehow feel relieved.

According to this enlightening article, “many psychologists believe that in addition to giving us an outlet for a rapid build-up of a powerful emotions, crying is a social signal to others that we’re in distress”. It is also considered an outlet for shedding stress. In fact, it is believed that emotional tears contain more protein particularly linked to higher stress levels, which is thought to make them thicker and more noticeable as they streak down the cheeks. It is a call for support and empathy and a way of releasing stress-related chemicals from the body.

We cry mostly when we’re sad. In this way, it acts as a signal to others that we are in distress and it is a call to induce sympathy and attention. This may explain why the waterworks appear more often in children and women.  According to a 1980s PhD study by biochemist William H. Frey, on average, women cry 5.3 times a month, while men cry 1.3 times in that same time period.  There may be a biological reason behind this, as the hormone prolactin – found at higher levels in women – is thought to promote crying.

We cry when we feel that we are overwhelmed with emotions that are too difficult to handle. And suddenly thoughts invade our head that make us feel even worse, such as that things aren’t going our way, that we don’t have time to be or do the things we want, or that others are better off than we are. A whirlwind of reflections and feelings ensues entrapping us into a vicious circle that simply accentuates the waterworks.

But we also cry when we’re happy. It is a way of demonstrating how we feel – that we are so overjoyed, we sometimes can’t believe it. That powerful string of – positive, this time – emotions is what causes the tears to run. It is a good thing. But this too causes us to feel exhausted after a while.

It is believed that crying depends on a person’s level of sensitivity. We don’t all think the same way, nor do we feel the same. People react to different circumstances differently. That is what makes them unique. They should not be judged for it, but rather appreciated for their own way of responding to whatever life throws at them. Crying is not a sign of weakness after all; it is merely a sign of emotions and the fact that a person’s heart is beating faster at times.

The cat on the pier

http://media.gettyimages.com/photos/view-of-cat-sitting-on-pier-picture-id565807123?s=612x612Hannah was surprised to see it there. It appeared silently right next to her. She didn’t even realise it came. But they always seemed to appear when needed the most. It was usually a dog that care around bouncing all happily without a care in the world. That she expected. They always had a way of cheering you up. Just by looking at them and the way they run around wagging their little tails. Some even look like they’re laughing. It was just impossible to stay mad or upset at the sight of them.

But this, this was strange.

The little cat sat there, straight up, tail wrapped around its front legs. It was fluffy white and seemed indifferent to everything that was going on around it. People tried to call it, but it listened to none.

Then it turned its little head, its small, round, golden eyes reflecting the setting sun’s rays. And it met her gaze. Hannah was dumbfounded. She couldn’t believe it was ever possible to feel such serenity through a simple gaze, and indeed, from a four-footed creature. The cat tilted its head sideways as it continued to stare into Hannah’s eyes.

Hannah took out a handkerchief from her pocket and wiped the tears that were still dripping from her eyes. The cat slowly got up and moved towards her, arching its back and beginning to purr. Once close to Hannah it began to brush against her, asking for some patting. Hannah touched its head with the tip of her fingers. With a single move it rotated its head around her hand and moved ever closer, its purr now reverberating on Hannah’s body. It was soothing. The cat managed to divert all of her attention on it that she soon forgot the reason she was so upset.

They sat there for a while, the cat purring at her side, and Hannah patting it, relaxed and calm. They watched the sun set into the sea, and then the cat suddenly got up, stretched and disappeared, as silently and abruptly as it had arrived.

The blue ball

sad_blue_eye_by_emilyeggplantImagine the sensors inside your head as a small ball that light up according to the emotion you feel. Think, for example, that when you’re excited, happy, positive, the ball lights up yellow, shining brightly and illuminating your entire brain and thus essence. But when you’re sad, that ball becomes blue.

Although associated with serenity and calmness, blue is also often linked to sadness. And when the ball in our head turns blue, that is usually when the waterworks begin, when the tears fall sometimes even without you truly knowing why.

It is much harder to change the colour of the blue ball into something else than any other colour transformation. But often times it is necessary to offer yourself some sense of reprieve. To allow yourself to get rid of the blue ball and its negativity that brings you down.

We need the colour in our lives, to enable ourselves to change moods for our own psychological sanity. It is not often easy. But balls are made to roll.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Reprieve

The value of Joy

http://i0.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/019/227/Inside-out.jpgWe all have a few voices in our head. They’re the ones that come to you when you’re fretting over a decision to make. Or when you’re in a fight with someone; when you’re too stressed to think straight. Or most of all, when you’re sick and too exhausted to move.

Our lives would be so much easier if only Joy was in our head. Jumping up and down with excitement. But we all experience periods of Sadness, Anger, Fear and even Disgust. They are all part of who we are. And they are the reasons why we appreciate Joy even more, and the moments we spend being happy.

It is during the moments that life strikes you down when you value the times when you are at your best and most upbeat. But it takes a lot of inner strength to get there, and support from those around you and not just the voices in your head.

In the darkness

Shadow in alleyShe was no ordinary girl. She lived in the shadows.

Among the darkness formed by the towering walls at midnight hours. Among the lanterns that were blown out by the breeze that blustered from the dark alleys. Among the black figures cast by the inferno of abandoned souls.

She was not a usual person. She dressed in blackness.

Like the despair that covered her soul when she knew not what more to do. Like the colour of the cats you are supposed to superstitiously avoid crossing paths with. Like the colour of an evil witch’s garment.

She was not smiling. Not even when I first saw her or gave her a hug.

She could not, for there was a hole in her heart. Torn out by the sadness looming over her head like a dark cloud. But the rain would never come to wash it all away.

She could never live again. Not in the happiness she deserved. She had lost it all that night the car took a wrong left turn. It was all too quick. Too fast. Too sudden. There was nothing more to do. To be. To see.

She was no ordinary girl. She was just a shadow.

Also part of Daily Prompt: Nightmares

Things you never tell

confidentialEveryone – no matter age, gender, social background, or political beliefs – has things they always want to say but never do. Things are just left boiling up inside of us, yet are never uttered. No matter the instance or the person, there are similarities we all share. Here are a few:

– I dislike rude people. Even more so when they work at service desks, either in person or over the phone. Also hypocrites. They are possibly worse.

– I cannot stand people who think they are so important that everyone must set out the red carpet whenever they simply show up. Self-interest, self-prioritisation and greed are possibly the worst of humanity’s greatest evils.

– I am deeply disappointed by people who so boldly state that they will always be there when you need them, but are nowhere to be seen when that time actually comes. Equally despicable are those who pretend to listen but never do.

– I despair with the fact that I cannot get paid for the work I produce, which is doing something that I love.

– I hate that another so easily manages to engage in doing exactly what I am still striving to achieve. I hate it more because I envy them. Yet, some are now doing what they previously scolded me for pursuing so ardently.

– I love what my work allows me to do, but I am opposed to sending my work out with someone else’s credentials, simply because they cannot produce the work they so proudly proclaim they can do.

– I get irritated by people who think they are educated simply because they graduated from a university, but cannot correctly compose a simple text, while they have difficulty even in articulating a few words.

– I despise the fact that money may not be everything but it definitely helps in getting you everywhere faster.

– I resent the truth in the saying “do good constantly and you will never be remembered, do wrong once and you will never be forgotten”.

– I am heartbroken that things never turn out the way you want them, no matter how hard you try, and you always have to settle for the next best thing. Unless you’re the guy next door. Because it seems for the neighbor, everything is always so much easier.

Also part of Daily Prompt: Break the Silence

Surviving the jungle

volcanoIt’s amazing how the smallest of things can trigger the biggest outbreak you’ve ever had. How all that sadness and anguish that for so long you’ve been burying inside of you can come trickling out like molten lava from a dormant volcano that suddenly erupts. It doesn’t really take that much in the end to make the world tremble.

Sometimes, no matter how much or how far you run, emotions catch up with you. And it usually happens faster than you think. And certainly when you least expect it.

So you’re up from the break of dawn one day sending emails and catching the wrong bus, trying to orientate yourself in this jungle we call world. You go about your business, suppressing any thoughts that might jeopardise this pretentious sanity that you demonstrate. And then suddenly, when everything seems to be going right for you, you take a left turn. You accidentally fall onto an old message. One that reminds you of tender times. Of just a few months ago when everything was so different.

And then it comes.

The eruption.

You begin to question everything.

And can forget nothing.

The tragically funny thing is that we always run back to times when everything was OK, forgetting the hardship that we once had to go through to get there. Because in the end that is not what matters. It is not so much the bad, but it is the good that remain imprinted in your heart. The hard moments are there to make you stronger, wiser and more resilient. They are there so you can learn to appreciate more the good times.

So all you really have to do is ride out the storm. The sun will shine again soon enough.

 

Also part of Daily Prompt: Set It To Rights

A porch of memories

Friday Fictioneers - porch

PHOTO PROMPT -Copyright Rochelle Wisoff-Fields

It had been years she had last visited the summer estate. It was too painful to return after he was gone. But now she could no longer avoid it.

The minute she stepped onto the porch it all came flooding back – the happy memories of a time past; the laughter; the dreams that were made; the expectations that were created for a life that never was.

It was exactly like she remembered – with the Greek columns reminding her of her glorious ancestry.

But now, the words “Forever” they had carved at the bottom were gone. Leaving only “eve”. Her name.

 

Part of Friday Fictioneers

Cold Black Hearts

Black black heart

 

 

 

 

 

Black clouds fill the sky
Dark as my heart.
The cold freezes the misty air.

I sit here alone
the snowflakes melting
into raindrops.

There is no warmth,
No fireplace lit. The memories
are burning.

You forgot and so easily
moved on. But my soul
is still hurting.

Shattered dreams
like broken glass
never the same again.

There is no life
in winter’s frost. No love,
no remedy.

It’s time for something
fresh. A new start.
Maybe next year.

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